Thursday, September 06, 2007

Wednesday Notes

A few tidbits from my brain....

1. Work has been a little nuts lately. This week we went through our semi-annual, "shake the box"-style reorganization. This reorganization has left my team with half the people we had last week, but with the same amount of work to do. It's not clear how this is going to work. The management team has been doing a lot of tap dancing and hand waving, but has failed to come up with anything even remotely logical. This leaves me to assume that we'll all be "Working Smarter, not Harder" again. Sigh. I HATE "Working Smarter." While I do like to think that my coworkers and I are reasonably smart people, I think there's a limit on how smart any given group of people can be. Especially given that we've already been "Working Smarter" since the last reorganization six months ago that stripped away about a third of team population and vital work was already starting to fall through the cracks. Personally, I'm past the point of worrying and now I just spin in my chair and giggle a lot. And even when we're not spinning and giggling, the whole team (or what's left of it) is doing a whole lot of goofing off. For example, right now I am posting when I should be working.

Unfortunately, it seems that we're all smart enough to know that:

(Infinite amount of work) - (Anything we might accomplish today) = (Infinite amount of work)

Damn those algebra classes. Sometimes being smart actually reduces productivity. Go figure.

2. Sadly, it appears that I'll need to reexamine my retirement strategy. The tip jar is not as lucrative as I had hoped it would be. The total to date has stalled at $1 and 5 pence. I don't know how much a pence is, but I don't think 5 of them are enough to buy me a condo at the Shady Rest Retirement Community.

3. It's the first week of September, so you know what that means. That's right! It's the start of the Christmas shopping season! While shopping for my tip jar last week, I noticed that Santa's minions were busy busy busy stocking the store shelves with all manner of Yuletide decorational-type accessories, including, but not limited to, fake trees, tinsel, lights, assorted tree baubles, and a 9-foot inflatable Santa in desert combat fatigues holding a big sign that said "Support Our Troops." I don't have the mental capacity to go off on this right now, so I'll save it for later. Right now I have to get back to some very important chair-spinning.


Blogger Kara said...

You have a couple months yet to go off on the Christmas decor methinks.

But what I really want to know is...does Santa support the troops?

3:26 PM  
Blogger ian said...

Maybe you're approaching the whole work/tip thing wrong.

Switch to the lawyer model: billable hours in six-minute increments.

"You want me to do that job for you? That's fine...But it'll cost you depending on how long it takes me."

"I'm not going to pay you!"

"Then do it yourself, ass!"


7:41 PM  
Blogger Cheesy said...

Cripes I thought I was seeing things yesterday while picking up camp supplies... I also saw Christmas tree lights... EEK

Take a spin for meeeee!

8:47 AM  
Blogger Jazz said...

1) Reading this, I couldn't help but think I was in a Dilbert comic strip.

2) It was worth a try, but you'd probably have more of a chance with the lottery.

3) Santa in fatigues? I can't get my head around that, much less comment on it.

9:10 AM  
Blogger Schmoopie said...

LMAO@ the Santa thing!

Sorry the tip jar thing is going so poorly. The nursing home where I work costs $7000 per month for the residents to live there. Guess we all need to step-up our strategies for retirement eh?!

10:38 AM  
Blogger Em said...

That whole "work smarter" thing seems so good to the people who want you to actually work more without any extra compensation. But for you...not such a glamorous corporate policy.

And hey, you got a buck! That's more than I would have expected LOL

7:26 PM  
Blogger Mauigirl said...

I hear you on the reorganization thing. I've gone through it many times. And right now there is talk of selling off the unit of my company that I happen to be in at the moment. Sorta like musical chairs, I got transferred over to this unit about a year ago and now we might be sold - so I may not have a chair when the music stops. But more likely I'll just be moved to another job and have more work instead, like you!

10:22 PM  
Blogger Whippersnapper said...

Ah, good old management teams. They have them in high schools too. One member of my school's management team has thoughtfully placed five (5) special needs (read: totally retarded) kids in my grade 11 chemistry class. "If any particular lesson proves to be a little over their heads, we may take them out for that day."

I just smile and nod.

11:24 PM  
Blogger Jill said...

kara, Apparently Santa does support the troops. Why else would he be wearing combat fatigues? After all, the red, furry suit is a lot more fashionable.

ian, Hmmm, you've got a pretty good idea there. I'll have to get more creative with the final insult though. I think "ass" could be considered swearing and I don't want to get in trouble for that.

cheesy, It's ridiculous, isn't it?? Am spinning for you right now....

jazz, It's true. I live in a Dilbert cartoon.

schmoopie, Yikes. I guess my new riterement strategy is "Get hit by truck and die quickly."

em, Totally agree. They're trying to squeeze out the last bit of of my creative juices. Soon I'll be left as a dried up husk of my former self.

mauigirl, I guess it's the same everywhere. Good luck.

whippersnapper, Hey, that's a new strategy! If the kids don't understand something, take them out of class. Perfect.

9:27 AM  
Anonymous rachel said...

Don't give up so quickly! The tip jar just needs time to catch on. Besides, if that doesn't work out you have your nail polish naming gig to fall back on. :)

10:14 PM  
Blogger Jazz said...

When you're done spinning your chair, there's an award for you at my blog...

11:29 AM  
Blogger Evil Spock said...

May Evil Spock suggest grifting? Evil Spock has been a fan of the mobile shell game, and getting change for a twenty when you present a ten.

11:47 AM  
Blogger Jill said...

rachel, Maybe there's a way to combine the two. For every dollar dropped in the jar, I'll spout an obscure, meaningless phrase. I'll make a furtune!

jazz, Thanks! I'll check it out.

evil spock, Grifting is an excellent suggestion, but it requires cleverness and manual dexterity, plus the ability to lie with a straight face. I just don't have those kinds of job skills.

8:20 AM  

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