Signs

1. The first sign that you are getting old:

You see a group of kids passing a doobie and the first thought that goes through your head is "Oh, that's a cold sore just waiting to happen."


2. The sign that something fun happened last night after you went to bed:

You awaken to find the kitchen counter littered with:
- a half-eaten bag of Lays potato chips*
- a mostly eaten can of Pringles potato crisps*
- a partially eaten milk chocolate Dove bar*
- one empty beer bottle
- one used shot glass
- a cork screw

*not in the house when you went to bed