Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Forbidden Words and Phrases

In our house, we maintain a Forbidden Words and Phrases list. Any visitor to our home is welcome to add any word or phrase they don’t like to the list, and that word or phrase will then be unofficially banned from use in our house. Here’s the list in its current state on the fridge:



The list started with DC and his former roommate Paula. About eleven years ago, they were painting their apartment prior to moving in, and the word “spackle” came up. That is a word that DC hates, for reasons that I won’t go into. Then Paula mentioned a word that she hated. Then they both came up with a few more. After a little more discussion, they decided those hated words would be posted on the fridge and banned from use in their house. The Forbidden Words and Phrases list was born.

Friends, family, and acquaintances have been adding to the list since it was first posted. The first word I added was “coitus.” (I HATE that word.) A few new words always appear during parties. For some reason, the list is hilarious, especially when everyone has been swilling margaritas. A friend once called us from a bar in Minneapolis for the sole purpose of adding “sans-a-belt” to the list, while her drinking companions cackled in the background. Yes, alcohol does indeed seem to make the list funnier. Go figure.

The list lived with DC and Paula initially, but was transplanted to our fridge when DC moved in with me and Paula got married. I still have the original list stashed someplace, but I copied it to a bigger sheet of paper when DC moved in, because it was outgrowing the 3.5x5 inch sheet where it started. Here is a transcription of the current list, roughly in chronological order. Notice that “synergy” made the list twice. Also, I realize “blog” is on the list. Please forgive me. It was added without my knowledge or consent by some as yet unidentified person.

spackle
alcove
slacks
“per se”
ointment
nook
moist
flavorful
swagger
davenport
divan
venue
gelatinous
salve
cherish
genre
brickle
packet
towelette
coitus
empowerment
copasetic
fruition
visceral
whimsical
sumptuous
“if you will”
hottie
hooters
potty
juxtaposition
myriad
passé
paradigm
basically
fiancé
homage
synergy
tornadic
poot
dungarees
stool
chaffed
plethora
foreign object
thirst-quenching
erect
quaint
friendly fire
panties
conundrum
bidet
sans-a-belt
snatch
gunk
nifty
co-ed
soiled
“weapons of mass destruction”
out-of-the-box
luncheon
irregardless (sic)
“no problem”
whassup?
hearty
encourage
kudos
sallright
scenario
synergy
bling-bling
literally
gash
“change it up”
proactive
sanitary napkin
blog
monkey bread
stink
dude
vunderbar
embedded
gland
organ
“so it goes”

2 Comments:

Anonymous Lisa!!! said...

OMG!!! That night in Minn, I was at Joe's garage! What a night! That was the night we met the pet white rat that lives on the upper patio of Joe's... Even better, that was the night I had my first Chocolate Martini complete w/ 3 chocolate chips! Heaven....

11:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Handbag
Nylons

(again, I know I'm months off, but I couldn't resist)

12:45 PM  

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