Nothing in Particular
I’m experiencing a serious lack of inspiration, and I’m blaming it on the holiday “grumpies.” Yes, the holidays are upon us, bringing all the accompanying guilt, stress, and subconscious longing for the Hallmark Christmas Special family that never was. Slag and I both become very thin-skinned this time of the year, resulting in conversations like the following:
Slag: “Honey, could you dice those potatoes a little smaller?”
Me: “Did you just call me a stupid bitch??”
So far, we have successfully defused a couple of squabbles before they could mature into full blown altercations of catastrophic proportions. Every year we get a little better at recognizing a stupid blow-up over nothing for what it is and nipping it in the bud before somebody says something stupid. By the time we’re in our 80’s, I predict we’ll be able to behave normally throughout November and December. God, I’m so happy I’m married to a real adult and not a child in an adult’s body.
Now I need to revisit the list of things that I hate. That will make me feel better. Besides, I think the last couple of items weren’t specifically labeled as list members, but they should be there nonetheless.
The current list of things I hate:
1. Hummers
2. August in Texas
3. yogurt
4. Ford Motor Company
5. Bill O’Reilly
6. “compact only” parking spaces
7. control top pantyhose
8. high-protein “nutrition” bars
Stay tuned for further updates….
Slag: “Honey, could you dice those potatoes a little smaller?”
Me: “Did you just call me a stupid bitch??”
So far, we have successfully defused a couple of squabbles before they could mature into full blown altercations of catastrophic proportions. Every year we get a little better at recognizing a stupid blow-up over nothing for what it is and nipping it in the bud before somebody says something stupid. By the time we’re in our 80’s, I predict we’ll be able to behave normally throughout November and December. God, I’m so happy I’m married to a real adult and not a child in an adult’s body.
Now I need to revisit the list of things that I hate. That will make me feel better. Besides, I think the last couple of items weren’t specifically labeled as list members, but they should be there nonetheless.
The current list of things I hate:
1. Hummers
2. August in Texas
3. yogurt
4. Ford Motor Company
5. Bill O’Reilly
6. “compact only” parking spaces
7. control top pantyhose
8. high-protein “nutrition” bars
Stay tuned for further updates….
8 Comments:
LOL...we have had almost that identical conversation standing in our kitchen. But like you, after 21 years of marriage, we can almost stop ourselves before it all leads to throwing meat cleavers.
Enjoy your holiday and drown all that stress in some extra yams and and an extra piece of pie!
For what it's worth, Happy Thanksgiving.
I am suddenly reminded of George Carlin's list of People Who Oughtta Just Be Killed.
Ian
Ah the holidays! Well at least in Canada Thanksgiving is way less of a big thing (and way earlier) so we the horror starts later than you.
Scrooge said it best: Bah! Humbug!!
Hiya Jill, I recently read an interesting study of vehicle cost and environmental footprint (factoring in the raw materials processing, costs, recyclability [is that a word?], operational values, and so on) from cradle to grave and the results were interesting. Hummers are better overall in cost and environmental footprint than a Prius (where the manufaturing waste ruins their value). I'll see if I can't find it again. I think NPR covered it as well.
Happy Turkey Day- here's hoping you and Slag take it easy on each other :)
Stucco and family
OMG an adult?? Where is the fun in that... and chit girl is he like a one of a kind?? heheh jk.... not man bashing at all but .... be at peace sweet girl.. and stay away from the pantyhose this week and all will be well with the world...
NON-control top pantyhose aren't so great either. I've had a few pairs where I had to tie a knot in the waist just to keep them up! :o
Making a list of things you hate makes you feel better? Whatever floats your boat I guess.
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